I don’t speak for all Autistic people.

I have read countless articles and listened to many podcasts by autistic creators that begin in this way…’ I don’t speak for all Autistic people’. And now I’m saying the same thing.  Why? What is it that drives so many of us to feel that this needs to be explicitly stated before we can go on to share anything else about our experiences?

Perhaps it’s because we are painfully aware of the damaging effects that autism stereotypes have had, and continue to have, upon us. The perpetuation of the idea of an autistic person as a young, white male, who is obsessed with trains and is a maths genius has been so pervasive in cultural and media representations, that those of us who do not satisfy this stereotype are often completely missed. Or even worse, our experiences are denied and negated- ‘Oh no, you can’t be autistic because you aren’t like ….’

Don’t get me wrong, some autistic people are young, white boys who are into trains. But a lot of us are not. Autistic people can be male, female, or non-binary. In fact, a study by the University of Cambridge revealed that ‘autistic individuals are less likely to identify as heterosexual and more likely to identify with a diverse range of sexual orientations than non-autistic individuals. Autistic people can be from any ethnicity. Autistic people are just as diverse a group of individuals as non-autistic people.

Before I was officially diagnosed, I had often suspected that I may be autistic. I knew I had many of the traits, (more on those in an upcoming post), but there were two reasons I kept coming up with to dissuade myself. One- I am quite social (more on that in another upcoming post!), and two- I didn’t ‘feel’ autistic. I now know, of course, that I am autistic, and always have been autistic. So, why did I not feel like I was? Because I did not see myself represented anywhere in mainstream culture. Although I am white, I was no longer a boy and I was never into trains, although admittedly- I was quite good at maths.

It was only when I started reading articles written by or listened to podcasts created by actually autistic people that I suddenly saw myself. I was able to ‘feel’ autistic. Because I’ve always felt autistic. I just never knew that this is what autistic feels like.

And by the way, those young, white, autistic boys who are into trains, grow up to be autistic adults. Some of them are still into trains (and if they are, then great), and some go on to develop other ‘special interests’. Because guess what? Autistic people, like non-autistic people, are unique, growing, changing beings.